Bratz Are Pretty Damn Freaky
This may be a few years too late to save any lives, but Bratz are pretty damn freaky aren't they? Its like somebody heard Barbies being called sexist and decided to show the world just how sexist a doll can be. Every single Bratz doll I've ever seen looks like something that crawled out of the bottom of a frat party . I once saw a Bratz Baby that had its thong sticking out above its jeans. Sexualizing tweens is one thing, but toddlers are just too much. What's next? Hot makeup covered fetuses? Abortion Beauties: From Planned Parenthood to the mall. I got Miscarriage Melenia, she comes with a handbag and the tears of her heartbroken mother.
I don't even think Bratz are human. I've seen humans. I am even friends with a few. Humans don't have eyes like that. Anime characters have more realistic eyes then that. Those lips aren't right either. Either all the Bratz have been ignoring their allergies and eating strawberries or they were designed based on the racist caricatures.
I hate those eyes at those eyes. They're always looking at me. Stop it! Those eyes…I feel like I'm in an Edgar Allen Poe story. The eyes follow me everywhere. They follow me around the room and piece into my brain. I even see them when I close my eyes. Haunting and mocking me. The only escape I can find is through dull 1800s Gothic imagery. Storm clouds! Dark colored birds! Take me away from this living nightmare!
Good point Toy Review. If one thing is bad, but other things are also bad, then who cares. Apparently something is only a problem if it isn't wide spread. Just look at Polio. It wasn't such a big deal when even the president was part of the Polio craze, but you get Polio these days and people are all like “Whoe! That mother fucker gots him some tiny ass legs, i'ght!”
Legally I don't have any kids, but if I were a parent I would have to take a stern look at these Bratz products my children keep talking about and ask myself a few question. Question like “Why is Anthony playing with dolls” and “What has happened to innocence?”
It's not bad that these girls are into fashion. The fashion they are into is bad. I like girls who wear belly shirts and visible thongs as much as the next red blooded American male, but I don't think we should be sending the message to little girls that they should be wearing clothing like that. Woman dressed like jezebels is fine and dandy in the club or at the mall but nobody actually cares about woman like that. There are plenty of men in her life, but none of them know her last name or care to find out. These woman can get by when they are 22, but then they hit 40 and things get sad. You know what I'm talking about, the middle aged woman who spends every night at the bar desperate to get any man but usually fails because years exposed to smoke has caused her skin to resemble leather. The only thing this kind of woman is good for is being the focus of a sad country song, or a happy Dr. Hook song.
Kids are always trying to emulate those they perceive as cool. Children of course have no idea who or what is cool, so they let toy manufactures tell them what is cool. When we get nine year old girls wearing their Bratz brand booty shorts and belly shirts its damn creepy. It gets even creepier when they turn 13 but because of all the make up they look like they look 18 and all of a sudden you have Jason Mewes banging on your door at three in the morning looking for a place to hide out until the heat dies down.
Hey little girls guess what? You're dressed like whores. Also I'm joining Mewes in jail if the feds find this picture on my hardrive.
Looking at a list of the Bratz girls on Wikipedia I have come to one conclusion, the nicknames for the girls makes them sound like candidates for the world's sleaziest Coyote Ugly, but the guy's nicknames are all badass. The girls have names like “Bunny Boo” “Kickin' Kool-ala” or “Glam Lamb” while the guys are called “The Dragon” “The Blaze” and “The Fox.” Going purely off the names I must conclude that all the boys in the Bratz universe are martial artists. I guess that's one check in the plus column for Bratz.
Aw hells noes Bratz. It was bad enough when the babies were showing their underthings from beneath pants, but now you have them parading around in their skivvies like they're a redneck father in July. I understand that babies normally walk around in diapers, but those are not diapers. Those are briefs. I don't think baby girl briefs even exist. I tried to find out but my search made Google cry. Even if they do exist you can't have dolls running around in them. Its just plain weird.
I'm not Captain Prude by any means, the many times a day I watch Clerks II is a testament to that, but having dolls in there underwear just isn't kosher. You can get away with babies wearing diapers. Babies in diapers is normal. Weird alien looking baby girls dressed like a prostitute going to the ice machine after a hard shift crosses the line. I don't care that these things are suppose to be babies. They look and dress nothing like babies. At the most they are just flat chicks. Flat chicks not wearing pants, so who is really going to care that they are flat? Here's a fact of life girls, guys want to see you not wearing clothes. It doesn't matter what you look like, you get naked, or even just in your panties and all guys who see you will be happy.
Maybe I am a hypocrite. I enjoy naked girls while at the same time rallying against dolls of naked girls. The key difference here is that the naked girls I promote are mere objects. Just like I mentioned before, the kind of woman who dress like sluts aren't real humans they are just things for our amusement. Girls shouldn't want to be objects. We should try to make girls want to be the best that they can. They should dream of being toxicologists or chefs, and should grow up with toys that will promote this goal. Dolls that dress like your mother (your mom is a whore) are giving our girls the wrong impression. Its not right to dress in the bare minimum amount of clothing. Bellies should be covered. Underwear should not be seen. Little girls should dress like little girls.
Now once they hit 15, then they can start dressing like whores na na na nootch!
